On Wednesday I dropped Rono off at a 10 day silent Vipassana Meditation retreat in rural Massachusetts where he will begin each day at 4:00 a.m. with a wakeup bell and be in ten hours of meditation practice throughout the day, interspersed with regular breaks and rest periods until 9:00 p.m.
Rono chose to enroll in this experience in order to go deeper into himself and become more aware of who he really is without the distractions and reactions of our every day world. His intention is to come back more clear headed, more conscientious in his choices and to become a more empowered version of his self.
For me, I’m not so sure I’d be able to take on an experience like that. I have a different way of experiencing spiritual growth. (Remember my journey to Peru last year?) Read more about that here
But, having no communication what-so-ever with Rono for ten full days has already taught me a few lessons I know you’ll understand and be able to apply to your life too!
1. Appreciate the contributions of your partner.
Rono’s and my life is very intertwined so the thought of him being gone for ten days with no way to reach him was pretty scary at first because he handles a lot of the day to day business and money transactions for Life Stylized. Though I appreciate that role he plays, it can be more invisible to me at times.
As in any relationship, things can sometimes feel out of balance when you don’t know how much the other person is doing and you think you are the one doing more. But now that I am aware of the things I need to monitor while he is away I can see how much he handles on a daily basis and I sure do have an appreciation for all those little things he manages.. and for him!
2. Autonomy is great, to a point.
Before Rono came in to my life I was a fiercely independent woman who took care of everything on my own. In the early days of our relationship this didn’t serve us very well at all as I was a know it all and do it all myself woman. Not the most fun (or charming) for a man to be in relationship with.
The other night as he was debriefing me on everything I would need to know about, I was pleasantly surprised to see how much he actually takes care of that I used to be in charge of. It made me realize how far we (and I) have come in creating a balanced partnership in both love and business.
3. Absence does make the heart grow fonder.
As cliche as this sounds, I’m sure you can already tell that this little ten day adventure has already made me appreciate my man more. And as more time passes, I am sure I will begin to see even more things that Rono does to make my life much easier and happier.
For two people are together nearly 24/7, this little break from each other is only going to empower us to be that much more in love with each other as we step into this next phase of our life and relationship. I know I am excited to have this space and to be more fully me as well when he returns. From this place we will have so much more to give each other.
When is the last time you took conscious space from your partner to grow your love? What tips do you have to share about appreciating your significant other? We’d love to hear from you.
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