This is YOUR week to… pay attention to who you’re asking for advice.
The hot water heater is broken in your apartment, rent is due, and your landlord has known for WEEKS that it needs to get fixed. Do you pay the rent anyways and trust that he will make the repair or do you hold off until he meets his end of the bargain; who do you ask for advice?
You and your partner have been planning a weekend away for months, the reservations and deposit has been made, then the night before you’re scheduled to leaves he cancels because he’s having cold feet. Do you go by yourself or eat the deposit and know this was a learning experience; who do you ask for advice?
Often times when difficult situations arise, I find myself wanting to know the answer right away. I need to know NOW so that I can move on with the rest of my life. When I don’t know the answer, it is often helpful to go to a trusted confidant to gather information and/or get feedback.
Despite the sense of urgency that my “monkey mind” may lead me to believe, I find that it is in my best interest to be mindful about WHO I go to for information and feedback rather than HOW QUICKLY I can talk to someone.
Would you ask a plumber for advice on how to train your dog?
Here are some tips to help you make more mindful decisions about who you are asking for advice:
1. When a difficult situation arises and you feel a sense of urgency arise, STOP and take three deep breaths.
2. Ask yourself, do you have the information you need to make a decision? If not, determine who would be the best person to ask for feedback.
3. Reach out to that person and if she or he is not available right away, resist the urge to contact someone else immediately. Trust that you will receive the answers you need at exactly the right time for you.
Since this is YOUR week to pay attention to who you’re asking for advice, what can you do to slow down your process and make mindful decisions?
Notice how you feel when difficult situations arise and you would like some feedback from another person. Let us know what you do to settle into that space and if you have an tips for us.